


Boss Even Before

by Sono_Umano_Ephiegel



Series: Yakuza Bosses [1]
Category: Katekyou Hitman Reborn!
Genre: 10gen, 10gen killers, Aware, Aware!Nana, BAMFSkull, Body liquidation, Borderline genius Tsuna, Boss - Freeform, Cervello, Crazy, Disposal of evidence, Drugs, Ex-mafia Namimori, First story, Gen, Hacker nana, Humour, Inheritance, Italian, Italy, Japan, Japanese, Mafia namimori, Mafia nana, Manslaughter, Murder, Namimori - Freeform, Non-oblivious!Nana, Pineapples, Pre-storylineSkull, Prostitution, Sarcasm, Serial Killers, Smart Tsuna, Tsuna runs Namimori, Turf wars, Unintentional, Yakuza, box weapons, dry humour, facade - Freeform, flames, forgive me for any OOCness, foundation, hibird - Freeform, insane, kamikorosu, killer, killer 10gen, mafia, oc s, protective, slightly AU, tonfa, unintentional murder, upside down - Freeform, vongola, yakuza tsuna
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-12-06
Updated: 2018-06-22
Packaged: 2018-09-06 22:07:42
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, No Archive Warnings Apply, Underage
Chapters: 11
Words: 15,663
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8771194
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sono_Umano_Ephiegel/pseuds/Sono_Umano_Ephiegel
Summary: He's already got a foundation in being a boss of illegal activities. Of course, life isn't simple, but it's rewarding enough to have "subjects" to rule over.He's so used to this bullshit...Except when you throw in a mostly absent father into the equation.*Please note that this is fictional, and I simply researched about the mafia and yakuza.





	1. Gravity

**Author's Note:**

> In which we grab a sneak peek to the daily life of the Momokyokai.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Because there isn't enough fanfiction about a pre-mafia Yakuza!Tsunayoshi, and killer!10gen. Not to mention a non-oblivious Nana and an ex-mafia Namimori.

  "Sawada-sama, the traitor has been caught and eliminated."

  "Sawada-sama! The mission is complete!"

  "Sawada-sama, there's an alliance request from the Raizen."

  "Sawada-sama, our hacker has uncovered something of vital importance-"

  "Please calm down!"

  At this, the motely crew that had been unknowingly pestering their boss got into the dogeza position, pleading for their leader to accept their apology, and that they'd immediately shut up. True to their word, the Four Pillars kept quiet, waiting for their leader to issue another command.

  In their eyes, their leader was an untouchable god, one who lorded over them with a heart of compassion and steel. It was a conflicting view, but only because they knew how he could be when someone provoked them, or even insulted a member, irregardless of ranking or status.

  Finally, the figure seated on the throne spoke to the figures knelt on the red carpet.

  "Kawamura?"

  "The assassination was a success, Sawada-sama! The target was successfully eliminated! One .338 Lapua Magnum was consumed, and the Barrett Model 98B has been reloaded and put into the safety mode!"

  "Well done, Kawamura."

  At this, the tall man blushed and chuckled, flustered.

  "Ah, it's nothing. I'd like to continue with a stakeout."

  "The Eastern Warehouse. There have been reports of a well known drug dealer loitering about. Your objective is to prevent him from successfully infiltrating the warehouse. More specifically, capture and receive the bounty."

  "Hai, Sawada-sama!"

  "This is the target. Memorise his details before you burn the file."

  Kawamura stood up, received the manila file and left.

  "Mizunuma."

  "The loose end, Chirama Udenshi, has been apprehended and all information has been extracted before the usage of the Karambit. Instant death via decapitation. Request for new mission."

  "A source of intel has informed me that Kujara Wantanabe has been accepting bribes from the Shimara. Your mission in to eliminate Kujara Wantanabe without witnesses. Memorise the target's details before filing the report."

  Repeating Kawamura's actions, Mizunuma stood up, received the manila file, bowed and left.

  "Akihiko."

  "Tadao Ushizu managed to hack into the Kawanami's database, uncovering blueprints of a prototype rocket launcher with plans of planting several improved Molotov cockails in the Bank of Namimori. We've sent a group to warn the Bank and authorities, and we've also begun searching for the bombs."

  "Well done, Akihiko. Keep me updated on the situation. You're dismissed."

  "Hai."

  Following Mizunuma and Kawamura's examples, Akihiko stood up, bowed and left.

  "Sazuka, leave the alliance requst on the desk."

  "Hai."

  And with that, he left, leaving the mysterious figure on the throne.

  


	2. Ascension

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Well, seems like Tsunayoshi's found himself in a pickle.  
> Who wouldn't be, if they unintentionally killed a gang boss?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Welp. Like I said, longer than Chapter 1. Though I enjoy a good 10 000 word chapter, that's beyond my reach, and may come off as too long or naggy to some people.

  The first time Sawada Tsunayoshi had heard about the rule, he gave a nervous giggle. He was just that feminine… And out of it. He was recuperating from a concussion, after all.

  “T-that’s a joke, right?”

  As the doe-eyed brunette slurred his words, the Momokyokai representative shook his head in the universal sign for no.

  “When you defeated Turako Yakishima, you had already proven your worth to the Momokyokai,” drawled Sakuza,”Even if you’re just a 12 year old midget. Then again, you know what they say- “hana yori dango”. Therefore, by force, you secured your position as the-”

  “HEY! WHAT THE FU-”

  “Urusai. Unlike you, I know to be quiet in the hospital.”

  “Naa, guys, don’t antagonise each other-”

  
**BANG**

**  
SHMACK**

**  
CRASH**

**  
WHAPOW**

  The now crowned Momokyokai Boss winced at the screaming that assaulted every patient in the ward, leaving two grimacing males that were left hoping the people outside wouldn't be hospitalized in Namimori Hospital. He looked at the other male in the room with a pleading gaze- pleading to the man that the ruckus outside was a one time occasion- better yet, the only time such discord had happened.

  The negotiator quirked an eyebrow and his lips.

  Tsunayoshi despaired.

 

  
  “Dame-Tsuna~”

  With that sickly sweet call, Tsunayoshi felt himself freeze at the sense of an amused Oikero Wakame’s stare. He knew that he wouldn’t be able to escape today, but he had tried anyways.

  Now? He really wished that there were lockers for him to squeeze into. Forcing 157cm of meat into a two meter locker wasn’t all that impossible.

  “How could you run away from us? I thought we were friends.”

_Friends_ , thought Tsunayoshi bitterly. _I wouldn’t understand companionship, much less friendship._

  “It’s alright though. It helps that I’m not your friend anymore, because we can do this.”

  Somehow, Sawada Tsunayoshi hadn’t noticed the five others that had accompanied Wakame to the routine. Each one of them sported smirks or cold smiles, and baseball bats or _penknives_.

  Tsunayoshi stared at Wakame’s ever growing grin and realised that he, being his good ol’ dame self, had frozen in place. He couldn’t move.

   _So this is “being paralysed with fear”..._

_I hate this feeling._

  “Well then,” continued Wakame with false cheer, “let’s start!”

 

 

  
  _How long has it been…? An hour? Two?_

  Sawada Tsunayoshi lay on the ground, grieving for his face which had over five short slashes across, body black and blue and legs a canvas of slashes. He lay there, wondering why he had chose his current “dame” facade.

  That’s right.

  His whole life was stacked precariously on a pile of lies revolving around him. He liked to compare it to the tower game he saw some days ago. What was it called? Jenga, Jemba? He couldn’t remember. He tested many things, using himself as a test subject to find out what types of attitudes people liked and hated.

  He tried modelling after Sasagawa Kyoko first, but people begun to worship him. He didn’t want that- followers instead of friends. The few friends he had turned out to be manipulative bastards trying to do some power plays.

  He gave up on that attitude after a month.

  The next month, he tried to be smarter, and thus racked up some serious brownie points with the teachers. He got straight As on his report card, but people began whispering behind his back, claiming that he was a cheat who had bribed the teachers.

  He let go of that persona.

  Then he tried to be like Yamamoto Takeshi- calm, happy-go-lucky, but he failed in one part.

  He was terrible at sports.

  Thus, he lost every last friend he had- all of them wondering why he was so weird, changing personalities every month. Instead, he found bullies.

  Tiny balls of crumpled paper, spat out of straws.

  Penknife-inflicted gouges on his desk.

  Teachers and students sneering whenever he approached, mumuring about how he was _such a failure, a useless deadweight that would end up pulling every person down with him, a waste of space, of air, of precious resource…_

  Eventually, Sawada Tsunayoshi gave up. Not just on trying to have friends or popularity, but also on trying to be a model student.

  What was the use of pretending to be someone he wasn’t? After all, all the students and teachers would just end up… pissed, to say the least. They’d accuse him of cheating, and probably even claim that he was a wizard who concocted some potion to increase his non-existent IQ.

  The world just hated him, no matter what form he took.

  So here he was, trudging along the path with bruises on his ribs and scrapes on his elbows, when a man and a group of lackeys jumped him.

 

  
  “Oi. Pipsqueak.”

  With apprehension, the brunette turned around to face whoever had called him.

  It was a ravenette with dark, gleaming eyes of a deep aquamarine. Dressed in an impeccable suit with a GUN by his side.

  Tsunayoshi didn’t know what model it was,  
  But he “eeped” anyways, understanding his predicament.

  This was someone dangerous.

   **No shit sherlock.**

  ...Even without his crazy accurate intuition being a sarcastic ass.

  “The hell you doin’ here, eh? Pipsqueak, you didn’t get the damn message? This our territory, yeah. Well, no problem. I’ll give you a memo,” cue the man stepping forward in an obvious attempt at a threatening gesture, “With my fist.”

  Tsunayoshi hadn’t known when the punch was thrown, but he did remember panicking. And, of course, he pulled out the pepper spray from his pant pocket and just… Panicked even harder. In his panic, he ended up flinging the can of pepper spray at the strange, threatening man… And promptly made a mad dash for home.

  “GYAH! SON OF A BIT-”

  In the distance, Tsunayoshi vaguely registered the suited man scream in agony. Then he remembered that the can of pepper spray had been made of plastic, and had cracked some days ago after he tripped.

  In the dim moonlight, he winced for the man. The can had probably broke open when it made contact with the man’s head.   Ah well, at least it had bought him some time.

  Behind him, twigs began to snap and he could hear footsteps. Loud footsteps.

  “Gotcha, lil’ brat. Now stay. FUCKING. STILL.”

  But of course, like any sensible person, he dodged the first baseball bat swung in his direction, and the subsequent ones that tried to get him.

**One coming from the left. Angle to the right by 10°, pull!**

  Through his intuition, he managed to disarm one of the grunts. Unfortunately, the heavy bat let him down, since someone smacked his rib from his back. He ended up staggering towards the suited man, and let go of the baseball bat he had been holding as he tripped over nothing. Just like that, the bat sailed through the air in a perfect arc, _clocking_ the suited man on the forehead and thus _knocking him out._

  All the commotion died down.

  Embedded in the man-who was slumped against a fence- was a large nail, around five centimeters long.

   **Embedded. In his chest.**

  Tsunayoshi felt his mind rebooting rapidly.

   **Wow**.

   _What just happened-_

   ** _The nail was hammered in wrongly, ending in a five centimetre spike that managed to pierce the man. Speaking of which, isn’t 5cm long enough to stab the heart from the back?_**

  At that, Sawada Tsunayoshi’s mind officially shut down. He felt himself going towards the man- he refused to think that he had inadvertently caused a _death_ \- and kneel down.

  “Oyaji? D-daijobu desuka?”

   **He’s obviously not alright. He’s dead.**

  No response.

  Every gang member watched on with mournful eyes as the teen began to realise that he had killed their boss.

  “O-oyaji, don’t sleep here… It’s not… Healthy…”

  As the teen made a move to pull the man off the fence, the puncture wound _splattered_ blood all over the petrified teen. At this, it was too much for him to handle, and he blacked out, his vision promptly blacking out the glint of metal in the corner of his vision.

   **Stupid**.

 

  
  “Hiee! De-demo, I didn’t know of the rule beforehand! Besides, I’m a civilian-”

  “That can be easily rectified, bossu.” 

  “Don’t call me bossu!”

  “Hai, Sawada-sama.”

  “Please, just call me Tsuna!”

  “That wouldn’t do, Sawada-sama.”

  Tsunayoshi sighed in defeat, as it was obvious that Kuzen was insistent that he call him with a respectful suffix. He just hoped that whoever was outside was better than him.

  Then again, the trio outside had been incredibly rowdy.

  Kuzen poked his head outside.

  “Have you three settled down yet?”

  “Yes. Yes, they have. Haven’t you?”

  “H-hai!”

  “O-of course!”

**Well. Get ready for the four pillars of the Momokyokai.**

_Wait, what?!_

  As three more people entered the tiny room, he felt himself shrink under a glare. Specifically, from a rosy haired man who seemed incredibly ticked at him, despite Tsunayoshi never having met the man before. Following him was a green haired man who seemed to smile all the time, and a stoic blue haired man. They made for quite the sight- a cheery long haired man, a blonde who kept his hair in a disconnected pompadour, a glaring rosy haired man and a bluenette who remained impassive.

  “So you’re the one that killed Yakishima?”

  “No, I swear! It was an accident!”  

  The glare the pinkhead had been sending him softened.

  **He’s amused.**

  “Well then, Mr. It-was-an-accident, we need you to recount the incident.”

  “Hah?”

  “We have our own database, and the status of every member is recorded within. We need your account of the naiLife incident.”

  **What a lame name. I mean, “nail” and “life”? How unoriginal.**

  Vaguely, Tsunayoshi registered the green haired man pour himself a cup of water.

  “Umm, it was last night. I just came back from school when I unintentionally entered his “territory” and he attempted to give me a beat-down. So I threw my can of pepper spray at him-”

  
-At this, the green haired man spat out all the water in his mouth and began guffawing-

  
  “- And ran. Halfway through, he caught me and I managed to disarm one of his lackeys. Unfortunately, I got bashed on the back by one of them and accidentally pushed the boss.”  
When he finished, everyone fell silent as the pink haired man developed a frightening aura. Every able body- which meant everyone but Tsunayoshi- shuddered and shuffled away from the rosy haired man.

  **He’s angry.**

  _No shit, sherlock! Hiee, I’m gonna die!_

  “HIII-”

  “You… Killed Yakishima by accident… WHILE I PLANNED FOR THREE WHOLE MONTHS?!”

  “Eee…?”

  At this, Tsunayoshi’s mind blanked.

  _What_.

  “I spent three months and nearly forty thousand yen preparing all the materials for the traps! Observing his routine, his habits, his likes and dislikes! I wired security cameras to every spot in the office! And you just skipped all that because of sheer dumb motherfucking **luck**! That’s… That…”

  After his outburst, he realised that everyone was gaping at him.

  The bespectacled man shoved his glasses back up his nose to conceal the blush that began revealing itself on his cheeks.

  “Look, I’ve always hated him. Pompous ass would just swagger in, demand info like it was worth only a hundred yen for each bit! Hell, he instructed me to go on espionage missions just because he hated my look! He’s a full out asshole! A full time douchebag! I mean, he even reopened the child trafficking twig again!”  

  “Hiee, child trafficking?!”

  “True.”

  “Naa, Akihiko-chan, you’re ranting again.”

  “I-I’m not! I swear-”

  “Introduce yourselves to Sawada-sama.”

  At this, the four men stared at Tsunayoshi briefly, before assuming the seiza position.

  “Mizunuma Suisen, head of Torture and Interrogation branch of the Momokyokai, Close Combat specialist, Enforcing Pillar.”

  That was the drawl of the blue haired man, who was rather tall and seemed to be in his thirties. Stoically, he nodded to the next person.

  “Kawamura Hiroku, head of Assassination branch of the Momokyokai, Long range Sniper, the Primary Pillar, naa.”

  That was the cheerful introduction of an ever smiling man, whose very presence soothed Tsunayoshi. He clapped the next man on the shoulder before withdrawing his hand.

  “Akihiko Kaishi, head of Tactical branch of the Momokyokai, Intelligence and Security specialist, Secondary Pillar.”

  The pink haired man smiled at Tsunayoshi, seemingly apologising for his glare earlier.

  
  “Sakuza Kuzen, Momokyokai representative, head of External Relations and Alliances branch of the Momokyokai, Delegate of Momokyokai and the Tertiary Pillar.”

  
  That was Sakuza’s introduction, and the four of them got into dogeza position, sat back in seiza and spoke in unison:

  “We, the four pillars of the Momokyokai, thereby acknowledge you as the fifteenth Momokyokai Boss. Do you, Momokyokai Boss, acknowledge us as the Four Pillars and your position?”

  Tsunayoshi shut his eyes tightly. This was it. He had no choice, but to take up the mantle of the man he had murdered.  
Thus, he opened his eyes, an orange will branded inside.

  “I, Sawada Tsunayoshi of Namimori, thereby accept you four as my pillars, and my position as the Fifteenth Momokyokai Boss.”

  “Juugodaime sounds pretty good.”  
In a flash, all four men had stood up, grinning at Tsunayoshi (except for Mizunuma, he was still wearing a poker face) welcomingly.

  “No, please don’t. Ju-just call me Tsuna. That’s what everyone calls me.”

  “Sawada-sama(naa)!”

  Tsunayoshi **despaired**  at the four synchronised voices.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sono: Slightly over 2000 words...  
> Ephiegel: It's hardly enough to appease the tiny audience I have.  
> Nyamu: Shh. We did good, alright?  
> Ephiegel: *sobs* No. I'll wake up tomorrow with a tiny riot outside my flat.  
> Sono: She's right. For once.  
> Nyamu: *sighs* No.  
> Ephiegel: For a short explanation of the Pillars...  
> Sono: They're just a couple of OCs.   
> Nyamu: The Enforcing Pillar is the weakest.  
> Ephiegel: The Primary Pillar is the first line of defense.  
> Sono: The Secondary Pillar is for Level 3 threats.  
> Nyamu: The Tertiary Pillar is for desperation.  
> Ephiegel: The Four Pillars will hold up the roof-  
> Sono: That is the boss-  
> Nyamu: And they will shoulder any burdens they can.   
> Ephiegel: I'm still gonna die.  
> Nyamu: NO.


	3. Luca

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Tsunayoshi finally comes to terms to the fact that he's now a boss- and Sawada Nana reflects on her life.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ephiegel: Like I said, Nana has a larger role in my story.  
> Sono: She's always hated how Iemitsu and Tsuna always left her out of the loop.  
> Nyamu: Not to mention their obliviousness and sorta neglect sorta thingie.  
> Ephiegel: Also, I saved all the emails I receive when someone leaves a kudo or comment.  
> Sono:Commenter-kun~  
> Nyamu: Arigato~  
> Ephiegel: "I love this idea so much! Although I've only read a little bit so far, I can already tell that this is going to be one of my favorite stories!" says rapidtiger123.  
> Sono: You flatter me, rapid-kun~  
> Nyamu: RainAmbrosius says, "Wait!Come back!!! I need more!!! This is gearing up to be super amazing!!!"  
> Ephigel: *blush*  
> Sono: Ehehe... We've got a... Stalker...  
> RainAmbrosius: GIMME MY CHAPTER-  
> Nyamu: Get yo ass out.

  “Tadaima-”

  “Tsu-kun!”

  Instead of the usual “Okaeri” he expected, he received a armful of his mother. His mind was still somewhat slowed due to the medication he was on, but he finally remembered- h e hadn’t returned the previous night. Well, it was no wonder that his mother was so worried. But a bitter, teeny-tiny part of his brain chortled. 

_   How would she feel if she knew that she was bringing up a mafia boss, and hugging one too? _

  The thought gave Tsunayoshi a sudden jolt of revelation. That things wouldn’t be the same- he was never a mafia boss or heir before this.

  Strangely enough, he wasn’t aware that another boss  _ was  _ considering him even before, but only as a last resort.

  He would also have no way of knowing that that said boss’ three sons would die, and that he would be the boss of two families.

  But for now? It didn’t matter, because he didn’t know. How would he? His father was missing for the majority of his life, and claimed to have “gone to be a star”. The only thing Tsunayoshi credited him with were as listed below:

 Sperm Donor

 Payer of the house they were in

 Creating great amounts of **distress** to his mother

 Giving great **happiness** to his mother

 Being oblivious to  _ certain  _ developments

 Being a god-awful liar

 

  And that was just about it.

  “Tsu-kun, are you okay?! The hospital called to say that you were in a car crash!”

  He told himself to stay strong and drove himself out of those dark thoughts.

_ When one is lonely, their chest feels hollow and empty. The best thing to do, is then to fill the hole.  _

__ “Don’t worry, kaa-san! If the hospital releases me, it means that I’m a-okay!”

  And Sawada Tsunayoshi winced as he realised that he had inherited his father’s genes when it came to lying. He managed to detect a short spike in killer intent, but relaxed when his intuition didn’t act up.

  In other words, the person whose killing intent had flared up harboured no ill-intent towards him. But if that was the case, who was it-

  “Is that so? Mataku, Tsuna-kun! You need to remember the Kerb Drill! Do you need me to-”

  “Ah, I’m kinda hungry…”

  “Of course, how silly of me! Sit down for a while- I’ll make your favourite Salisbury Steak for you!”

  “Mom, you're the best!”

  And as Sawada Tsunayoshi entered the Sawada Household, he failed to notice the eyes that darkened in anger.

  
  
  


  “Oishi! Kaa-san, your Salisbury Steak is the best!”

  Despite her son's reassuring voice, Sawada Nana still felt somewhat hurt.

  Why would her son feel the need to hide something from her? She could feel her god-awful lying skills- something, she believed, needed the touch of Luca, and not Nana. She blamed the man she called her husband, that idiotic Mafioso that had turned into a chauvinist as she deployed her feminine wiles. 

  She blamed herself for never insisting that he stay the night.

  She blamed herself for never teaching Tsunayoshi to stand up for himself.

  She blamed herself for causing hurt to her son by calling him “dame”- something she had thought would strengthen him.

  She blamed herself for locking away that part of her.

  She had tried to understand that her husband needed whatever comfort she had offered, because he was the CEDEF head.

  She tried to tell herself that it was to protect her and Tsunayoshi.

  But if that was the case, then the man had done a seriously bad job. After all, why did he refuse to station any men around their residence? Why was he unaware of the assortment of assassins that had foolishly taken literal shots at them, thinking that they had stood a chance?

  There was no answer, except for the variety of excuses she had heard over the years.

_   “I'm off to become a star, Nana-chan!” _

__ Was he going to die? Become a guardian angel and become the star he wanted to be?

_ “I'm sorry, Nana, but one of the oil rigs exploded.” _

__ Why wasn't it on the news, then?

_   “Nana… I… Need to go.” _

  Not enough time between work and his family? What a joke. He just wanted to prioritise Famiglia over Family.

  By now, it was night time. Tsunayoshi had already bid her goodnight, leaving her to her spiral of a mind.

  She thought just a while longer, before her mind wandered back to many other things. Absent-mindedly, she popped in a Frank Sinatra record.

_ Fly me to the moon,  _

_   Let me play among the stars… _

__ Asawa Luca swayed her hips to the beat, before gliding towards a spacious area in the large room. Slowly, she began to waltz around the room like a swan would, ducking and weaving about the obstacles in the room.

_  
_ _   You are all I long for,  _

_    All I worship, and adore… _

  As Asawa Luca saw the truth for the first time in years, she reminded herself of what she had became.

  An airhead of a wife, smitten with a manly gentleman.

  But that was Sawada Nana, and she was the tiny, cut sapphire. Delicately blue, with the hint of a sparkle.

  Asawa Luca was the sharpest diamond, rough, uncut, and bloody murderous. 

  It was time.

  She had enough of the man’s happy-go-lucky attitude. It grated on her nerves.

  His attempts at being romantic, being excuses she had had enough of.

  His airheadedness, matched only by Nana.

  The way he was so distantly attached to them. So annoying, so idiotic, so pitiful an attempt at protection…

  If he had wanted Nana and Tsunayoshi to stay oblivious of the Mafia, of the role he held…

  He should've just cut the connection,  **fully** .

He should've just cut the connection  **altogether** .

  Because he had screwed himself…

   And his family.

  
  
  


  Tsunayoshi Sawada couldn't sleep.

  He lay there, stiff and unblinking, in the comfortable sheets.

  The air conditioning was at the usual temperature- 25 degrees celcius. It was energy efficient and comfortable.

  His fluffy bed was comfortable.

  The Frank Sinatra record being played was comfortable and soothing.

  His state of mind was incredibly uncomfortable.

  It was difficult- the sudden enlightenment that he had a role in the Momokyokai. That he was the  _ boss.  _ That nothing had changed around him, but himself.

  He wondered absentmindedly how his mother would react to the fact that he wasn't dame.

  But then, he thought, this was his chance to show that he was good for something- being a leader.

  It was time to lose the façade that hid him from public scrutiny. It was time to show society that he had never been  _ dame  _ to begin with. That he could contribute as a fully functional citizen. Or criminal, whatever.

  And to do that, he would have to admit that he was uncomfortable with being a criminal.

  He was, however, aware of his own approval at being a possible protector.

**That falls under that Hibari kid, but who gives a shit.**

He rolled his eyes.

_ We could assist him. Maybe help him with contrr- protecting Namimori.  _

__ **True. After all, we can be supplementary.**

_ We probably won't be, if we play our cards well. All we need to do is to search about the database of Namimori, about what he wants, likes and the similar details. _

__ **Perhaps. But who would do that, then?**

Tsunayoshi thought for a moment, Eidetic memory working in overdrive.

_ That would fall under the pink haired guy… Akihiko Kaishi, I think? _

__ **Yeah. He's the hacker of the group.**

_ We'll have to evaluate the virtual defenses of the Hibari, though. _

_    **True** _ **. Just ask him to send a probe first, maybe an untraceable virus.**

_ Onioning? Or just destroy minor data? _

**Onioning the IP address might take a bit. Depends on his level of skill. Start with the probe first. Thereafter, up your game.**

_ And after that? _

**After onioning, transmission of the virus will take place. Ask for a virus that could steal and send data simultaneously. It needs to be an incognito sorta thing. Like a spy.**

Satisfied, Sawada Tsunayoshi shut his eyes and set himself at ease.

As the Frank Sinatra record continued playing smoothly, he had one thought in his mind.

  He'd foil the plans of the criminal underworld.

He'd be the Maverick of the criminal underworld.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ephiegel: For those puny minds to understand what we wrote would be a miracle.  
> Sono: Asawa Luca was Nana's real name.  
> Nyamu: She named herself Nana because she used to head MANY gambling dens. And we all know the jackpot number... 777.  
> Ephiegel: That means she has a better intuition than most.  
> Sono: Luca was involved in the Mafia underground and had delt with many Yakuza gangs.  
> Nyamu: Many of them feel indebted- the Momokyokai being one of them.  
> Ephiegel: She's also a badass- smart and battle trained.  
> Sono: She's going to start training Tsunayoshi some things, isn't she.  
> Nyamu: Yes. Yes she will.


	4. Boss Even Befour

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which revelations are shown, and they're comparable to the clearnet- it's only the tip of the iceberg.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sono: Gah! Where's the trashy notes page?!  
> Nyamu: I don't know!  
> Ephiegel: I DON’T EXTREMELY KNOW!  
> Sono: Urgh, I've got a migraine…  
> Nyamu: Need help-  
> Ephiegel: EXTREMEEEEE!

  
  Tsunayoshi yelped as he accidentally trampled on a stray OGEL brick.

  “A-ah! Bossu-sama, I didn't know you were gonna visit, naa!”

  “Gah! W-why was this OGEL brick lying around like that?!”

  “I like playing with OGEL bricks.”

  “O-oh-”

  “They give me ideas for new weapons.”

  Tsunayoshi sweatdropped as Kawamura chuckled lightheartedly at his statement. Surprisingly enough, the lighthearted man was actually the strongest in the four pillars in terms of combat. Well, not that he had any combat skills to begin with.

  Tsunayoshi sighed at the casual way Kawamura stated that-so matter-of-fact, and the chuckled at the end.

  As if he wasn’t discussing methods of thinking up new weapons.

  “Naa, Bossu-sama-”

  “Tsuna-” corrected the tired brunette instinctually.

  “- Why’re you here? Well, not to insinuate that you aren't welcome here. You're the boss, after all!”

  “A-ah, I came to terms with the fact that I was actually the boss-”

  “Bossu-sama…”

  “A-ah? Nani-”

  “Dya mean that ya never accept’d us ta begin wif?!”

  Tsunayoshi stared, panic amagalmating in his eyes as Kawamura began to prod the mushrooms in the corner. The gloomy despair that surrounded the man seemed to enlarge as time passed, eventually coating a quarter of the man’s room with a thin layer of depression.

  “C-chigaou-”

  “Soon, ya gunna leav like dat guy. Probab’y gunna disow’ us.”

  “Kawamura-kun, that's not it! I just came to terms with me becoming boss, not you being my friend! Kawamura-kun, I swear that’s all!”

  As sudden as the sheen of darkness had appeared, it vanished into the air as Kawamura turned his watery eyes to him.

  “H-hontoni?”

  Cue the sparkle of the sheen of tears. Honestly, he looked like some lovesick fool who had broken up with their significant other.

  “Really.”

  Kawamura nodded to himself.

  “W-well, ‘f Bossu sniff sama seys so, ‘ts gotta be tru.”

  Tsunayoshi watched as his promise let the man stand up again. 

**You know, I think he dropped the verbal tick and butchered his words. Maybe he used to live on the streets-**

 

_Somewhere else in the world_

  “Tch. Another goddamn rejection… Why the fuck can't I fit in?!”

  Strange shadows casted by the sun, distorting and lengthening as it dipped beneath the horizon.

  The thin stream of smoke, created by a cigarette. 

  Of yearning spoke the figure in the desolate area. 

  Rants of biases, of selfishness, suffering and loneliness. 

  Many emotions hid themselves behind the human shell.

 

 

**-Considering the dog tag and the scars, it's possible he used to be a test subject. With the guns and knives under his coat, it's possible he’s paranoid of someone coming after him. His experimenters, perhaps?**

  As his other side rattled off a list of theories, he replied to Kawamura that he was here to assert his first day as boss- perhaps by improving the conditions first.

  “Naa, Bossu-sama, they’ll be happy to see you!”

  Absentmindedly, he noted that he was being dragged out of the room.

 

_Somewhere else in the world_

  “Kaa-san…?”

  Reserved attitudes didn't suit him. 

  And with her final breath, she murmured a selfish wish. 

  In it was hope and pain, both blossoming in her chest… 

  Never to be felt or seen again.

 

  
  “Who’s that kid…?”

  “Poor sonofabitch who wandered in…”

  “Shi-hashira…”

  “Screwed…”

  Tsuna was hyper-aware of the wreath of questions surrounding his mere presence. It was to be expected- not everyday that you see four grown men dragging along a tiny kid-

 

_Somewhere else in the world_

  “Nyaaah! Lambo-sama doesn't want to sit in the weird chair! It hurts!”

  Thrashing. 

  Hurties. 

  Unacceptable! 

  Never again would he, Lambo-sama,be hurt! 

  Denial that his family would do this to him. 

  Evanescent happiness, hope, laughter… 

  Rearing it’s ugly head, Hate.

 

  -who seemed to be inspecting the inside of the Momokyokai base. 

  Understandably, it could raise plenty of suspicions that the person stated in the previous statement was a spy. Unfortunately   for Tsunayoshi, he knew that he looked nothing like a spy…

  Focus-

  “Bossu-sama, we've arrived at your office.”

  Startled, Tsunayoshi yelped at Akihiko’s sudden interjection, which had interrupted him from his thoughts. Standing a respectful distance away were the four pillars, who had opened the door for him. 

  Three of them had stoic faces of neutrality on. (Except for Kawamura, who had a warm grin that made Tsunayoshi’s heart warm-) 

  The Sawada gulped. 

  There was no turning back. Was he ready to accept the sins that came with being a criminal? 

  ...No, no he wasn’t. 

  That was how he stepped into the office, his eyes gleaming with a tint of orange resolve.

 

_Somewhere else in the world_

  “Fucking “EXTREME “ freak. That'll teach you.”

  She was hurt… 

  Understandably enraged, the white haired teen staggered to his feet. 

  Never would he let his little sister get hurt again.

 

 

  Instead of being a criminal, he would be a protector. 

  He had the smarts even before this.

  This… Could be his courage, his authority, his _power_. 

  To slaughter and succumb, or to protect and guide.

  Really, it was such a simple question-

 

 

_Somewhere else in the world_

  “Kufufufu. We've **finally** killed those mafioso **_scum_**.”

  Many cries of merciless people for mercy. 

  Insanity lurking at every corner, seeking to devour.

  Strange mutations, experiments, beatific and cruel. 

  Then, for all his efforts to purge evil, he was thrown into an underground, earthly hell.

 

  -That he didn't need to think to get the answer. 

  If the situation got out of control… 

  …

  Well, he’d need some weed-killer then.  


 

 

  “Bossu-sama, we've compiled a list of stuff to improve, naa!”

  Tsunayoshi Sawada had been whirling around the room with his new swivel chair. It was a nice, black, typical office swivel chair- jiggly and all. 

  He had told the four pillars ( **shi** - **hashira** , his intuition pinged back) to compile a list of stuff that needed to be improved in the Momokyokai. Along with a possible list of to-dos, like **(secret tunnels and hidden rooms** , his intuition pinged back again, causing his mind to have a 2.0 magnitude earthquake) meeting any important people that needed his introduction or the like. 

  Now, Kawamura Hiroku kept that warm smile on his face. It never seemed to drop off, except for that incident he had unknowingly triggered. 

  With a grateful smile, Sawada Tsunayoshi took the file from his guardians.

 

 

  Five hours later, he regretted it.

  “WHAT THE HECK WAS THE PREVIOUS BOSS DOING?! THESE ARE ABYSMAL LIVING CONDITIONS! HE DIDN’T SUFFER ENOUGH!”

  “BOSSU-SAMA, CALM DOWN-”

 

  Finally, Tsunayoshi finished his rant. Absentmindedly, he noted the dropped jaws at his rant. He himself was rather surprised- never ever did he recall being this worked up.

  In a sudden flurry of motion, Akihiko attempted to restrain Kawamura, who still managed to sneak past him, pluck his beloved boss out of his seat, and squeal at his cute appearance. 

  “Fuwaa~ Bossu-sama, you're absolutely adorable~”

  Sawada Tsunayoshi heaved a long-suffering sigh. 

  “You're not gonna put me down even if I asked for that, right?”

  “NUEVAR.”

  
  “Tadaima.”

  “Okaeri, Tsunayoshi.”

  The use of his full name had him on edge. It was clearly his mother’s voice, but it seemed deeper, more challenging, rebellious… Just… Different.

  He wasn't sure what kind of different it was, but the unease stifled much of his thoughts.

  “H-hello…?”

  “I’m in the kitchen.”

  Cautiously, he withdrew the dagger that Mizunuma and Sakuza had insisted he bring. “ _For your protection, since people will doubt your strength.”_ That was what they had said.

  **Focus**.

  He snapped to attention and peeked around the corner of the wall.

  What his Intuition had forgotten to tell him was that his mother was right round the corner.

  “Tsunayoshi.”

  “HIEE- Kaa-san?”

  “Sit.”

  With that single word, his mother shut him up, and he directed his body to the dining table, seating himself at the same spot.

   Tsunayoshi.exe has stopped working.

    Processes rebooting…

     Network restart in order…

      Restart complete.

 

  “Tsunayoshi. I am not Nana.”

  Tsunayoshi felt himself stiffen. Who was this, then? An imposter? Oh god, was this person a m _urderer? His assassin? Did they already kill his mother-_

  “I am her true self.”

  At this, he snapped back to attention. **_True self? Could it be…_**

  “I am Asawa Luca, legally known as Nana Sawada.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ahh...  
> I have to rewrite all my notes again...  
> Anyone can spot what I did during the different scene changes to the guardians?  
> Also...  
> I have discovered the wonderful line break.  
> Still not gonna use it that often.  
> Nyamu: Yanno, that Rain Ambroisia thingie kid popped by to see you again.  
> Sonou: Did they repeat the same thing?  
> Ephiegel: Yep.  
> Nyamu: We've reached thirty bookmarks, sixty-five kudos, eight comments and a thousand and sixty eight hits.  
> Sonou: Dayum.  
> Ephiegel: Ah, that reminds me! Arigato, Girlwithshinigamieyes!  
> Nyamu: She googled Katekyo Private Tutor.  
> Sonou: She's disgusted by the honeyed cotton of a manga.   
> Ephiegel: Ahem, moving on, DCJoKeRHS...  
> Nyamu: They're fangirling over Kawamura, eh?  
> Sonou: WAAh!! XD  
> THANKYOUTHANKYOUTHANKYOOOUUU! XD I LOVE THIS!! XD  
> (OMG these darlings are so CUUUTE! XD)  
> (CAN I MARRY THAT TSUNA-FANBOY-PILLAR?! 8v8 HE'S ACTING CUTE!) I quote.  
> Ephiegel: ... Yes. I will marry him to you.  
> Sonou: history loves the new Nana.  
> Nyamu: Ah, that's good.  
> Sonou: H-san commented on the third chapter too.  
> THIS IS BEAUTIFUL! XD  
> (Why am I imagining "Mama, I'm off to work now!" "Ah! Any troubles and don't forget to call!" "Fine! I'll update you on the latest deals when I get home." "Good!" X'D Just perfect Yakuza/Mafia family of two, then they both hide it from Iemitsu and it's HILARIOUS! XD)  
> Ephiegel:... Is H-san psychic?  
> Nyamu: Maybe.  
> Sonou: Neh, H-san... How would you feel, being in our story as Hiroku-kun's wife?


	5. Boss Even Before: GO!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh, I had PLENTY of fun with this chapter.

 The first, and most remarkable difference Sawada Tsunayoshi would remember was the way she held herself.

 Like a coiled fox, Asawa Luca held herself in what a casual observer would have dismissed as a relaxed and laid back posture. He saw more than that. He saw how her muscles were  **coiled, poised to** **_strike_ ** **at** **_any point in time_ ** **. How they were poison tipped claws that would rake across your chest, and** **_feast_ ** **on your** **_still beating heart._ **

 Then there was her knowledge.

 She could manage everything and anything- could use her words to buy a kilogram of tangerines for five hundred yen, could sweet talk Tsunayoshi into telling her whatever she wanted.

 “As the new boss of the Momokyokai,” she had began, scaring Tsunayoshi as how  _ the nine hells did she know about that it was supposed to stay secret-  _ “You will need to learn. Learn to fight, to lead, to shoulder your responsibilities and the like. You will learn, for there is no other way to survive in the underground. You  _ will learn, and you will yearn.” _

__ Then she began by launching her real background at Tsunayoshi.

 His mind was whirling at the influx of knowledge.

 Sawada Nana, otherwise known as Asawa Luca, had been in a  _ gang.  _

__ She had been in a  _ gang. _

__ **_A gang._ **

**** The bit of information changed his view of her completely. 

 He began to notice her unnoticed grace, her fluid motions, her subtle nudges, manipulations, the hidden glint in her eye, her hidden  _ sorrow. _

__ Sorrow at what?

**The bastard of a father,** his intuition supplied helpfully.

 He didn’t know about his “beloved Nana-chan” ’s background. Nothing! He didn’t know Tsunayoshi’s birthday, didn’t know that Sawada Nana hated to see him sprawled on the ground, comically snoring but truly exhausted, and it pained her to see him leave every time, to see him so vulnerable, so deceptively innocent on the couch.

 But he digressed. 

 Asawa Luca, she had introduced herself. Sawada Nana was that airhead of a mother, of a wife who had seemed out-of-it, so high up in the clouds, refusing to see the grounds of reality. A façade that many others had believed.

 Asawa Luca came from an loving household of four- her parents, her, and her brother. Her mother slowly wasted away from the chronic illness that had forced itself upon her, that had forced her husband to overwork himself. 

 Strangely, it was Tsunayoshi’s maternal grandfather that passed away first- from overworking himself from the four jobs he took on. Each job had a meagre salary, an income that wasn’t enough for all four of them.

 Her mother, wrought with grief and increasing frequencies of her fits, realised that she would need to leave one member of the family behind.

 And it was with a heavy heart that she announced her leave.

 Too bad that Asawa Luca was having none of it. She sent herself to the orphanage, and her family left, one burden lighter.

 Asawa Luca tried to help around the orphanage, but the landlord’s rent was still unpayable- far too high. Eventually,  _ they _ came in the night and torched the building down. Everything that was her life, her home for the last week -  _ a week-  _ burned down in a fiery blaze that devoured the rickety wooden structure.

 The pendant around her neck was the only thing left, but it was of sentimental value. After all, it was the only image of her family, smiling and happy. 

 She wondered how much it had cost them to look in the dumpster for a pendant and a camera with film.

 Systematically, Asawa Luca stalked her target with an almost obsessive attitude. The man would return back home to his wife and son, coddle them a bit before going to bed after filling his lump of a belly.

 The wife was also rather snobbish, and the son a tyrant, and Luca resolved to… Take out both of them as well. 

 Eventually, she prepared well enough, and her mission could finally, truly begin. Killing the man was easy (at this Tsunayoshi shivered, his mother has taken a life away- a villain, but a life nonetheless), though the wife and son…

 ...They turned out to be Asawa Lui and Asawa Toma. 

 Or, Asawa Luca’s mother and brother.

 Stunned and disgusted by the fact that both of them had become so corrupt, and so uncaring of the sacrifices they made, of others in their plight, of others...(all necessary- a couple of lives for success) Asawa Luca strangled the two of them to death.

 The gang she was in- Monme- had kept the house under surveillance, and had already wanted to kill the landlord, but Luca had helped them. As such, Monme accepted her readily. Such talent couldn’t go to waste.  

 In a year, she was known as the “Nadeshiko no Osore”- Ideal Female of Fear. It wasn’t very creative, but considering the terror she left in her wake, it was rather appropriate. 

 In that year, she had established a casino, complete reign over Namimori, and helped many gangs- one of which was the Momokyokai. 

 Two years later, she left and started work as a waitress in Takesushi. She changed her name legally to Sawada Nana. 

 Five months later, she met Iemitsu.

 Three months after initial contact, she learnt about his true job, about flames (deathperation flames, or dying will flames- she'd teach Tsunayoshi about that later) and about the Mafia and all that, the whole shebang.

 Five months after the discovery, she married Iemitsu Sawada.

 Within two years, her life had twisted, rampaged and repaired itself.

 Too bad she learnt about Burns, Scalds and Branding.

 Burns were light injuries in the relationship of two flame-active people.

 Scalds were Second degree Burns that could shake a relationship.

 Branding was permanent, painful, and reduced the second party to slaves.

 Asawa Luca’s relationship experienced Branding.

 Sawada Iemitsu had shackled her down- knowingly or unknowingly, it was still a great crime to bind a Hibari down, much less a rare Sun from the Hibari lineage.

 Asawa Luca, or, rather,  _ Hibari  _ Ayako, was the cousin of Hibari Kyoya, and the daughter of Hibari Lui, sister of Fuji Hibari, who was the mother of Hibari Kyoya. 

 So despite the age difference, Hibari Kyoya was Hibari Ayako’s (or Asawa Luca) cousin.

 That meant that Hibari Kyoya was Sawada Tsunayoshi’s Uncle.

 “Kyo-oji?! What?!”

 Incredulous at the fact that a “herbivore” like him was related to the top predator of Namimori, he chuckled nervously, hoping that his mother would refute the claim.

**Nah. This is real.**

 “That’s what you’re gonna hafta call him, yanno.”

 His mother had began shortening certain words, and her words had a tough, steel tone underneath. Sighing in resignation, he mumbled out a “crazy lineage” and sunk into his chair.

**You don’t know the half of your crazy lineage.**

Tsunayoshi groaned in abject misery.

 “Kami-sama, just let me have a normal life-!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sono: Dun dun DUNNNNN  
> Ephiegel: She hyper?  
> Nyamu: She's on Chapter seven already.


	6. Boss Even Before: O-Dokuro

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Anyone ever realised that chrome’s “dokuro” is just Rokudo’s characters backwards? Ah well.  
> O-dokuro is a yokai in japan- a large skeleton that has an appetite for human flesh.  
> Basically, cannibalism not-canibalism. Can you really call a skeleton a human?

 Despite Tsunayoshi being “crowned” as the Pit of The Peach, he still had a plethora of tasks to do before rightfully earning the title- for real.

 Having, earning and deserving were two entirely separate things.

 The Momokyokai members and the Shi-Hashira were all too aware of the similarities and differences between the three terms.

 “Neh, neh, Ku-kun!”

 The man-child tugged at Sakuza Kuzen’s collar, effectively gaining the man’s attention. Since Kuzen was taller than him by eleven centimeters, that required him to jump up to snag his collar. 

 “Hm?”

 “Tsu-chan has the title of The Pit, right?”

 At this, Mizunuma Suisen and Akihiko Kaishi tensed. Akihiko stopped typing on his ORWL V2.0- the tiny sphere of a computer that was always attached to his stiKon belt.

 Suisen stopped toying around with his Karambit.

 The three of them knew about Hiroku’s past, and thus knew about his views on the world. He might appear childish and harmless, but there was a reason as to why he was Hashi-San, after all. It wasn’t that the Assassination Twig was weak- far from it.

 It was that when he was first in the Momokyokai, his aura was heavy enough to make the veterans whimper. It was when he crushed the previous leader, broke his bones, rendered him deaf in one ear, dislocated a section of his spine and punctured his lung.

 The previous leader was paralysed from the neck down, and the words that escaped his still functioning mouth was pure gibberish.

_ “Affa jinn rattdo porwal fewr fewR FEWR FEWRFEWRFEWRFEARFEAR-” _

__ … The man had repeated heart attacks when Hiroku was around. He would die and be revived, before thrashing and resisting a bit more and passing out. He’d have his seizures while unconscious, and bit off his tongue in fear of Hiroku, who had popped by for a visit.

 He choked on his tongue and blood, while he bit off his inner cheek and ended up ripping open the right side of his mouth.

 … Needless to say, he died of multiple heart attacks the next day.

 But he digressed.

 “Mmh, Bossu-sama does.”

 “Is he deserving of it?”

 Sakuza Kuzen paused slightly, thinking.

 Was Sawada Tsunayoshi ready for the role? Could he shoulder the sins and burden of being a gang leader? Could he function independently?

 The answers were the same- a resounding “NO”.

 But Sawada Tsunayoshi was gentle. Kind, and clumsy, sure, and a bit of a fool. He saw the evil, yet he sought to change it. And it seemed as if something let the Shi-hashira gravitate towards him.

 “...Aa.”

 “Then! Then! Has he earned it?”

 Kuzen thought back to that mop of untameable hair. Was the small, frightened robin ready? Did the cheetah deserve its speed? Did the animals on Noah’s Ark deserve their saviour?

 The robin would never be ready. But it would prepare, and it’s family would groom it. The cheetah needed its speed to set it apart, to pounce on small prey. The animals on the Ark were all chosen by Fate.

 Perhaps them meeting Tsunayoshi was Fate too?

 Kaishi and Suisen leaned slightly towards the duo.

 “Hm.”

 At the sound of such a noncommittal response, everyone in the room slammed their faces into the three walls.

 Sakuza Kuzen chuckled at their antics.

  
  


 “Kaa-san…”

 “Yeah?”

 “D-do I really need to go meet Hibari-san?”

 Tsunayoshi wept without restraint as his mother grinned while dragging him towards an intimidating building.

 “ ‘Course ya do! Strange question ta ask, yanno. Ya gotta meet your uncle!”

 “B-but, a herbivore like me-”

 “Ah, shut it, ya!”

 Finally, they reached the estate. It towered like a menace, overlooking the whole of Namimori like an indignant skyscraper that refuse to be held down by the weak bond of Gravity- and it sought to guard the other buildings.

 It had a traditional feel to it, however. Half of the entire compound was dedicated to a japanese mansion that seemed so delicate, and was dwarfed by the modern building competing with it. Yet the elegance both buildings exuded could not be denied, and Tsunayoshi felt like a mouse in an alley of wild cats.

 In other words, he felt like prey.

 But his mother seamlessly slid into the atmosphere of the area- she wasn’t just blending in- she was a part of it.

 “Intruders, identify yourself. You have five, four, three, two-”

 Tsunayoshi yelped at the intercom crackling to life, and the clear voice that sliced through the silence effortlessly. The knife left Tsuna feeling bare- as if he had been eviscerated, and all his innards were on display for the world. 

 “Hibari Ayako, bùgu niao. Wo de dan zai bie ren de wo.”

[ **Hibari Ayako, Cuckoo. My eggs are in another’s nest.]**

 The feral smile she had did nothing to ease Tsunayoshi from the feeling of being out-of-place in the gigantic compound.

_ Her eggs’re in another’s nest?! _

__ **Sounds like she was a parasite. Might be a reference to when she was on the streets.**

The whole thing was so surreal- he was boss in a night, and suddenly his mother claimed to be an ex-gang member.

_ Please let this be an elaborate prank- _

__ **You like it. Admit it- your life was boring before all this. It’s time to shed the dame mask.**

_ But- _

__ **You’ve gotten far too comfortable in it. You’ve let the others control you far too often. You are melting into the mask, Tsuna. You’re dulling and denting yourself like a crushed up ball of aluminium.**

**You need to stop being the herbivore. Reveal your fangs.**

_ … _

_  “Di yi bai ling ba lou.” _

_  [Hundred and eighth floor.] _

__ Loath as he was to admit it, his intuition was spot on as per normal. His mask was constantly affoxxed to him- it was a part of him and his lifestyle.

 But staying in a single mask for too long was dangerous, so it was time to shed it.

 He could lay himself down, let people inspect him. He would appear open, easily readable.

 They wouldn’t see the stiletto knife he was lying on. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sonou: Aah. Too much Chinese-  
> Ephiegel: But it's your mother tongue-  
> Nyamu: So suck it up!


	7. Boss Even Befall: Nana

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Sawada Nana manages to terrify her sister. Older sister, that is.  
> And also when Namimori gets a lil worked up.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sonou: Jeyee requested that we update-  
> Ephiegel:HOW DO WE DEAL WITH THIS-  
> Nyamu: Shush, we got twenty comments, Ephiegel-  
> Ephiegel: JUST GIVE THEM THEIR UPDATE-  
> Sonou: Mmkae.

 Namimori was a picturesque area. It had a beach, three schools, a population of 10,000 and many amenities that dotted its roads.

 Namimori was also a mafia retirement area, which was why virtually nobody outside knew of its existence. Thin Mist flames obscured it from view, and kept its existence a secret.

 Nobody knew whose mist flames they were.

 Unfortunately, that meant that every Namimori citizen was aware of or had contact with the Mafia. Not the Underground- specifically, the Mafia.

 Nana Sawada’s Sewing Store was down the road- turn a couple rounds and you would see it flicker into existence. Or, rather, see the words “Sewing” and “Store” melt out of existence.

 Those who knew of PARUMI SAFETY could depend on the enigmatic Paru and Rumi to hide them. Of course, entering the area itself already made sure than any mortal who didn’t know how to enter the sanctuary to be scared shitless or pursue a phantom down the street, past the safe little haven.

 Most idiots chose the latter, and their throats would spot a second mouth eventually- a sick approximation of a smile carved into the neck, courtesy of the hidden wire at neck level.

 More often than not, heads were literally rolling on the ground- fools who had accelerated so quickly and had been unobservant to the thin mist flames hiding the glint of the wire.

 Those down the road would tsk, mumble “Another fool” and leave.

 Every evening, a certain Hibari’s body disposal team would arrive, and hand off the riches of the men, though Paru and Rumi had to melt the metal of the coins or anything else the men had, or give away the money. Thus, it seemed as if they were philanthropists, when they were giving away a dead man’s money. The melted metal they crafted into a myriad of accessories, before handing it to the owner- one Sawada Nana.

 Sawada Nana would set up a stall, and money would come rolling in. Of course, she would gossip with the other wives that came to buy hair accessories.

 It was during one of those days that Sawada Nana let slip some information regarding the new Momokyokai boss while gossipping with the other housewives.

 “I heard that the new boss’ a gentleman! He’s got chiselled, handsome and super well-defined features!”

 “Heeh? Hontoni?!”

 From one housewife spread another ten that whispered of a fearsome man who was pure and kind. Eventually, the ten turned to a hundred, from the hundred to a thousand, and eventually those who had sworn off any involvement with the Mafia had themselves pulled into the sudden flurry of information.

 Sawada Nana gazed on with impassive eyes, though her sweet smile hid the devious plan she had began to cook up.

 She could smell it.

 But of course, a single person could only do so much, could only handle the tools, the spices… It was time to call in the favour that her darling Onee-chan owed her.

 It was time to contact Hai Lang Hibari.

 … Why did the Hibari clan need such unoriginal  names…? Naming your child sea wave wasn’t the most creative…

 

  


 

 The feral grin plastered on her face softened slightly as her son adopted a glazed, trance-like expression.

 She had known about his crazy instincts- ones that could send a lesser being into shock as their minds struggled and wrestled with the information computed into their brains with every sight, every sensation, every _instinct._

 “Di yi bai ling ba lou.”

  _The hundred and eighth floor._ Honestly, living on the floor that sounded similar to Hibari in chinese… Yi Ba Ling, or one-eight-oh… That was rather obvious.

 Then again, since when were Hibari subtle?

 

 

 

 “Yang wa wa~”

  _“Little doll~”_

 “Pao pao jie jie~”

  _“Big sister Bubble~”_

 Nana grinned as her older sister failed to suppress the subtle twitch of her left eye. She knew how much she hated the nickname. Her right eye symbolised something going well, while her left eye meant that something wasn’t going smoothly according to what she had planned out.

 When she was around others, her right eye constantly twitched every five minutes.

 When she was with Luca, her left eye twitched twice every half a minute.

 Honestly, Luca knew that her dear sister would tear herself apart, trying to decipher her “secret motives” and her next possible moves. Fuji wasn’t the Go mistress for nothing, after all.

 “A-ah! So, what’s the occasion?”

 Luca grinned at her sister’s slip up and the hidden wince that her sister let past.

 “Why, can’t I simply come to visit my _darlin_ sister?”

 “A-ara, who’s that cutie behind you?”

 “Pao pao jie jie-”

 Hai Lang’s left eye twitched-

 “-Zhe shi wo de er zi~ Jiao ta Su Na! Dan shi, ta bu hui hua wen… Ni kan! Ta de biao qing duo mo de ke ai ne!”

 “ _This is my son~ Call him Su Na! But… He doesn’t know Chinese… See! He’s got such an adorable expression!”_

And it was true. Tsuna stared blankly at the two sisters exchanging words in a foreign language that sounded like Japanese at certain points.

  **Chinese,** his Intuition supplied.

 But what were they discussing?

  **Who,** corrected his intuition, **and that would be you.**

And Tsuna remembered his mother insisting that he gain some experience in political sort of stuff. Power plays, negotiations, things that would give him an edge over any idiots that tried to tango with his intellect.

 Years ago, he had taken an IQ test online at his mother’s bequest. He received a score of 239- but of course, that was online. He hadn’t received an official test yet, although he was probably a genius. Online, he wrecked Go and Chess players alike, and he was a famous legend.

 Again, the account was originally just a means of testing himself, but eventually he received challenges online- at least 3 per online hour. Thousands lined up to view the matches online, their connections straining to catch even a glimpse of his legendary maneuvers. The same people would come, armed with the knowledge of his moves- until he pulled a new one and crushed them.

 He called himself Ci7ru5. 5 and 7 formed Go-na, Goner, a reference to any challengers. And the word was Citrus. He always did love citrus fruits.

 But now, the woman switched to Japanese and turned to Tsunayoshi, clearly noticing his lack of involvement, despite him being the topic they discussed.

 “Tsunayoshi-san-”

 “Call me Tsuna-”

 “Please call me Ariel. You _will_ eventually meet my dear Skylark soon, but not now. Do you have any experience with Go?”

 “Aa.”

 “Online or offline?”

 Tsuna felt the phone in his pocket vibrate. He pulled it out, unlocked it and showed her his account and the challenge that popped out. His aunt seemed rather shocked, stuttering out a “Ci7ru5?!” but quickly regained her composure, before requesting that he start the match with a certain Kej0n@.

  


 

 

 The match went as expected. Tsuna crushed his opponent with ruthless efficiency, and when the challenger came for a second time, he obliterated the persistent player.

 Aunt Ariel seemed rather impressed, so she switched to another topic.

 “Did your mother being you here for a reas-”

 “My Tsu-kun’s the Pit!”

 Immediately, his Aunt froze.

 “H-haha, good one, _Yang wawa..._ ”

 “I’m serious. He needs to learn how to control the flow of negotiations and the like. Basically, the Boss Bundle sorta stuff. Maybe you could throw in a bit of hacking, management and so forth? I mean, I’d gladly be his hacker and personal assistant, but he still needs some buffs and shine.”

 His Aunt stared at him. Really deeply.

  **She’s contemplating her next move, just like a Go mistress should.**

“And what makes you think I’d waste my time with-”

 “ _Pao pao jie jie wo ai ni,_

_Dan wo you ge bu hao de bi qi,_

_Qing bu yao shi wo tai sheng qi,_

_Fou ce wo hui na zhe dao qie ni~”_

“Big Sister Bubble, I do love you,

  But I have a bad temper- it’s true,

  Please don’t agitate me, or push me too far,

  Else I’ll take a knife and slice you in half~”

 Chills racked Tsuna and his Aunt as they clung on each other for dear life, terrified by the smiling woman.

 “O-okay! Now juST CALM DOWN LIL SIS DAMNIT-”

 “I knew you’d come round!”

 With that, Tsuna’s mother turned on her heel, all the while smiling a smile with far too much teeth for comfort-

 And left him in the hands of a petrified woman.

 “A-ah! Let’s… Just start.”

 Tsuna chose to disregard the tiny whispers of “crazy woman” and how she was the “only ray of sanity in the Hibari family”.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> To a certain Joker,  
> Thank you. Your support is greatly appreciated.  
> -Sono_Ephiegel_Umano
> 
> To everyone else,  
> Thank you. Also, i'm only one person, for those of you who think that I'm three.  
> -Sono_Ephiegel_Umano
> 
> Also, i'm not gonna reveal much, but Paru, Rumi and the Mist Flames are actually a part of the plot.  
> Please wait under a kotatsu.


	8. Boss Even Before: VARIAtions

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Because their Boss is their everything, and they are bound by a boundless bloodlust.  
> They are all variations of a model Varia member.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Phew! Mid years're finally over! Orite, time for YouTube!  
> Aay, check me out at I Am a Human! You'll find a uber weird image in a black background that I designed myself, by combining the I, A, A and H of my username. You know, I think I'll fail Chem-

 Superbia Squalo was most certainly not spewing out sunshine and rainbows from his ass. Neither was he appreciative of the long, carved mahogany table that stretched across the conference hall. It might have their Boss’ flames imbued within, but it kept reminding them of the situation. This wasn’t a SNAFU situation. This was basically the Boss-napping of their Boss. Pun unintended, seeing as how their boss was in a coma-like stasis.

 Thus, he felt the complete opposite, really- he was a very unhappy man.

 “How the fuck did this happen?! We were supposed to show that old coot that his security was complete shit! Pezzo di merda! Even CEDEF wouldn’t be able to mark out the damn kinks in the system! Fucking vents too wide, goddamn underground sewers… And so we fuckers do this operation to Wake Nono Up, and what the hell do we get? Nothing whatsoever, and our Boss hidden in some hugeass oversized ice cube that acts as a crazy ass holding cell.”

 “Squalo-”

 “Then we get our loyalties questioned. Assholes’re probably reporting to Incompetent Fool #2. Consulenza Esterna Della Famiglia? Hah, more like Competence Easily Dismissed Fools! And those are the people we work with in times of war? They’d probably be the ones causing the war!”

 “Ka-ching! The prince is highly displeased with the foul peasants!”

 Hell, even eight-year-old Belphegor was upset about the whole situation. Just a month ago, Squalo remembered approving the Boss’ plan to wake up the whole of Vongola to their shortcomings and lax security. Especially the loose-lipped ones. Iemitsu Sawada being a prime example.

 “Hell, Incompetent Fool #2 keeps spewing out shit about his “beloved son” named Sawada Tsunayoshi, and his goddamn wife! And guess fucking what? I found actual people with the same names, identities, particulars, ages and even features! For a head of security, his personal life isn’t some kind of secret at all! Damn ass can’t even do his part and cut off any ties! It’s a wonder how his wife puts up with him at all-”

 “SQUALO!”

 Startled by the sudden noise, Squalo halted abruptly and bristled at whoever it was that had dared to shout at him. But as the rage cleared from his vision, he realised that he was staring at  _ Lussuria. _

__ Normally flamboyantly annoying and flippant  _ Lussuria  _ had yelled at him.

 The discovery shocked him into a couple seconds of silence, and those seconds were enough to let Lussuria continue.

 “Squalo. Look, we’re all devastated at having our Boss forcefully separated and ripped from us. But as his second in command, you ought to have some measure of self-control! You know, as well as I do, that we are Varia. The Varia do not charge headstrong into a situation without a success rate of ninety percent or above. We plan, we calculate and we execute. 

 “But now is not the time. Now we plan, not go on like a mad bull in some kind of bullfight to a matador’s red cape. We’re going to be making fools of ourselves, and essentially leave ourselves open to any attacks from outside Vongola.”

 Lussuria paused, took in a breath and let everyone think for a bit, letting the information settle into their minds. Even Squalo looked rather abashed at his impulsive and careless behavior.

 “There is a reason why we are Varia quality. We succeed in everything we do. We specialise in taking lives. But this is new. This is uncharted domain. Not to mention the fact that Xanxus’ plan might have worked, and they might be working through and testing new security systems and measures as we speak. Damned if I knew what they’re up to, or what they’re going to implement, but we still need to think ahead.

 “If the whole of Vongola is truly classified under the “Useless and Mindless” category, all the more unpredictable they will be. When idiots are cornered, they will jump onto the barbed wire just to escape. In light of the “Cradle Affair”, Vongola will be under the mafia’s public scrutiny.  **We** will be under Vongola’s gaze.”

 “But, that bastard stole him from us!”

 It was a weak protest, but it was the only argument Squalo had left. It was rickety, and he had no doubt that even a kindergartener would be able to blow down the point easily.

 “Squalo, we were rash. Do you really want a repeat of the incident, drag our names through the mud and leave ourselves in the spotlight of negative attention? Look, revenge is also the Varia’s speciality, right? Then we shall come up with the greatest vengeance of them all. Remember the first rule of striking back: let it stew, let it pass- until we’ve gained back an amount of trust. Without any sort of faith, the whole legion of clams will surely trap us within.”

 Still not entirely convinced, he tried out the last card he could.

 “But, Xanxus was the perfect boss!”

 He knew it was a lie. He had learnt about Xanxus’ true heritage years ago. Xanxus was good- he could lead anything or anyone to victory, but he wasn’t of the correct lineage.

 In short, the Vongola Rings would reject him anyways. It didn’t matter how hard they tried.

 “Squalo, is your left arm aching?”

 “No-”

 Squalo paused at this.

 Perhaps it was the promise and proclamation of faith, but his left arm ached only when Xanxus was in danger. The fact that it wasn’t added a small measure of comfort. It wasn’t much, but the whole table visibly relaxed. Hell, the atmosphere stopped being dense and suffocating. 

 “That means that Boss is safe…” Levi’s deep baritone echoed within their minds. It seemed so surreal- a cryogenically frozen man, safe? Hah, not likely! But this was Xanxus they were talking about, not some wannabe who couldn’t fight for shit.

 “You know, if Boss was here, he’d say “stop moping around, trash.””

 “Well, if boss is safe…” started Mammon.

 “-Then we eliminate the liabilities!” finished Squalo, grinning a bloodthirsty grin. Almost immediately, all six leaders let their bloodlust loose. Simultaneously.

 The mook stationed outside felt his bowels loosen and scurried away to look for a rag. It wouldn’t do to have the legendary conference room to be soiled by plebeian materials. After all, he was Iona Kejberg for a reason.

 

 Mammon stared at the other five idiots who were eagerly planning the deaths of Enrico, Federico and Massimo. It was simple, really. Too bad that everyone was over-planning this. 

 But for Xanxus, they would gladly waive the fees that he would incur. Greed had no place in this mission. It could be an accessory, but nothing more. 

 Honestly, a simple method of elimination could work on Timoteo’s sons. They were defenceless little kittens, unsuited to lead the Vongola. The only candidate suited to the position would be Xanxus, but he was currently a human popsicle in headquarters. A rescue plan was improbable, considering the way Vongola’s faith in the Varia was greatly diminished by the fake coup d’etat.

 “Mu, just leave Enrico to me.”

 All heads snapped to the hooded illusionist.

 “And what’s the price?”

 Warily, Belphegor asked for the price. Mammon swallowed their thoughts of money and profit, squeezing them into a dark corner of their mind.

 “The eventual revival of Xanxus.”

 All the room’s occupants turned to stone at the shocking revelation that Mammon- the embodiment of greed- wanted  **nothing** in exchange for their assistance.

 “Care to elaborate further, peasant?”

 Mammon, yet again, swallowed their trademarked “It’ll cost you to know more”.

 “If the Inutile Trio lead Vongola, I’ll lose my cash cow.”

 The other five relaxed at the Mammon-isque answer. It was so predictable.

 “Useless Three?”

 “The Prince approves. Of course, we need to cover up any evidence that it could be us.” Belphegor snickered in his corner, sharpening his already-sharp knife.

 “VOII! Alright, listen up you shitty idiots! We’re gonna start in a couple of months! Each mission will be two, one and four months apart! Mission one is Eliminate Enrico, taken by Mammon, and to be completed by this month, June! Mission two: Massimo Murder, taken by Levi-a-than and me, to be completed by August! Mission three: Federico Fuck-up, taken by Belphegor and Lussuria, complete by September!”

 “Ushishi! What of the last mission, Shark-peasant?”

 Squalo smiled- a unfriendly and rather fear-inducing smile. Mammon felt a strange sort of excitement in the promised bloodshed.

 “Breaking Boss Out- to be completed by January First, New Year’s. Personnel involved: the whole of Varia- trustworthy ones.”

 Levi-a-than growled. A low, rumbling sound that seemed to affirm the plan.

 “Squ-chan-”

 “VOI-”

 “-We should work out the details between every assassination~”

 “VOII! Of course! What else are we supposed to do, huh?”

 “Oh, I don’t know- gaining Vongola’s trust in two months, convince them that we, the Varia, are  _ so  _ innocent, that we’re not gonna take advantage of them, maintain a public reputation, take care of day-to-day stuff… You know, the usual.”

 “The Prince shall lead you peasants, ushishishi~”

 “I will lend my assistance whenever I can.”

 “Mu, I’ll waive the charge this one time.”

 “I wanna add more bodies to my collection~”

 “... Let’s start planning.”

 

 

 

 

 

 “HOLY SHIT!”

 A certain Kejberg screamed at the other end of the Varia mansion, safely seated in the canteen. He drew much attention to himself, and many people flocked towards him at his exclamation of “NO WAY DID CI7RU5 ACCEPT MY REQUEST FOR A CHALLENGE!”

 

 

 The match went as expected. He was utterly crushed under the legend’s plethora of movies and their versatility. Everyone was awed that they had witnessed a challenger in real life, so most of them broke off into groups to discuss tactics. 

 They put forward Iona to play against him again, but he would listen to them this time. No way could Ci7ru5 win against the combined might of fifty minds! As such-

 

 

 “We need to talk strategy.”

 Belphegor had dropped his third-person method of speaking, and had begun a lengthy discussion. The whiteboard behind was filled with black magnets- enemies, and the only variation was the fifty coloured magnets. Blue, violet, lilac, yellow, red and green. There was a small squad of Brown at the side, awaiting its movements. But then there was a single light grey magnet, surrounded by the black magnets. 

 That was their objective- their Boss.

 “Quite obviously, this diagram isn’t accurate. We five are the only one who knows about this operation so far, so I won’t include any others who are still trustworthy. For now, we shall assume that all fifty of the Varia are trusted to execute the Operation.

 “We all know that Brown is the retrieval squad, and that we’re clearly outnumbered. It's either we go on a recruitment drive, or proceed with a manageable size.

 “Either way round, I believe that the former is much more feasible- we’ve got a huge lack of manpower now.”

 Everyone nodded at this, regret painting their faces an ugly shade of, well, regret. And embarrassment, with a light dusting of utter humiliation. Their foolish bit of recklessness had caused quite a number of officers to resign from their posts, or be injured to the extent that they retired to Support.

 “So we’ve got five squads…”

 

 

 

 “But now,” Levi-a-than started, “we have a final problem to deal with.”

 The object he pulled out was a small square of metal. The square was actually one of the Varia’s invention- a listening device that could attach itself to any surface and stay there. It was also the tiniest drone they had- a secret function that was privy only to the Guardians.

 “I suppose everyone has noticed a certain guardian’s absence?”

 A room of nods. Good.

 “Ottavio is a traitor.”

 The room fell silent- a traitor cloud? While Ottavio-ass had been a plastic Ken doll, he seemed loyal. Far too loyal, now that they thought about it. He had been a bootlicker for all of the four, intolerable years the man had made his presence known.

 The recording device was inserted into the desktop, and as the image of Ottavio and a man materialised, everyone hissed. Even Levi-a-than, who had probably watched this countless times without them being there.

 It was Timoteo.

 “Vongola Nono.”

 The polite greeting sent the whole room- Mammon excluded- into a fit of growls that reverberated throughout the room and carried outside. A passing member felt cold sweat beading his forehead and broke into an unsteady dash.

 “Ottavio.”

 The annoyingly close relationship the two had let the room into another fit of aggressive cursing and furious mumbles. The recording continued.

 “The Varia is up to something, Nono.”

 The loudest hiss came from Levi-a-than, who had a side mumble of “we’re always up to something” and “Boss would wring his neck”.

 Internally, Belphegor added in the Crazy Cloud- the only reason why he would have balls to defect- to the To-Kill List. Then, he was struck with a sudden thought.

 What if Ottavio had never really been on their side?

 The recording marched on, disregarding the miasma of loathing and intent-to-kill.

 “They’re always up to something.”

 “Nono, this “something” is far bigger than the previous plots and escapades.”

 A even bigger noise of disapproval. Calling their usual ruckus “escapades”? Boss would kill the insolent man just by the way that he implied Boss’ inferiority. And Belphegor would have a field day with an evisceration, probably. After all, “how dare the trash-peasant lump the prince with such peasants?!”

 “What is it then, Ottavio?”

 “A coup.”

 “A-a coup…”

 “They intend to overthrow you and usurp the seat of Vongola Decimo.”

 Nono leaned back in his office chair, his wrinkled features turning an unappealing pallor. Ottavio stood at the desk, awaiting his response.

 “When shall this coup occur?”

 Nono’s voice smoothened out as he slipped into the true Boss he was. The voice deepening. The sudden change in posture.

 The way his question turned into a command.

 “Three days later.”

 Two days was how long it took for the bug to fly back to Varia HQ. Those two days… They were busy planning.

 “Very well. You may take your leave.”

 “Pleasure doing business with you, Nono.”

 “Likewise.”

 Well, unless you were having a tango with the Varia, or trying to deceive them… 

 In which it would be rather unpleasant to deal with.

 

 The recording ended.

 

 

 

 “HAH? HE STILL WON?!”

 The fifty people seated in the canteen gaped at the results of the second match. Miraculously, Ci7ru5 still accepted their challenge… And promptly made them suffer the same fate.

 “No way… This guy… He’s better than Varia quality!”

 “Than fifty tacticians…? That’s crazy!”

 “Should we tell the big Six…?”

 An uncomfortable moment passed. They took a moment to pray that whoever was on the other end was an adult, and not just a young prodigy or the like.

 “... We probably should.” Thus and so, the flock followed Iona as they proceeded with their death march.

   (And also Tsuna’s, but what he doesn’t know will eventually come to him soon enough anyways.)

 

 

 

 “Meeting dismissed.”

 All five guardians stood from their seats and stepped out of the conference room, Mammon-first. Strangely enough, they had a camera in their hand.

 Then Levi-a-than, who froze. As did Squalo. As did Lussuria.

 Belphegor shouldered past them and froze at the “splat”.

 “Wh-what the actual… SHIT!”

 Lussuria screamed at the mere sight of it. Coupled with the small wet spot on the carpet, it was safe to assume that this was due to a newbie’s fear… Or a bad prank.

 “AaaaaAAAAAAAHHHHH NOOO! THIS WAS  _ THE  _ PERSIAN RUG WE BOUGHT  _ JUST YESTERDAY!” _

_  “THERE’S PISS!” _

_  “KA-CHING THE PRINCE WILL  _ **_OBLITERATE_ ** _ THE FOOL THAT DID THIS-” _

_  “ _ **HOW DARE THE INCOMPETENT NEWBIE DESECRATE THIS HOLY PLACE-”**

“ VOIII! WHO THE FUC-”

 Mammon snickered, silently thanking Fantasma. Flying was such a useful ability to have.

 (And blackmail was the panacea for their money-collecting problems.)

 [Not that they had any financial problems anyways.]

{They ran a betting pool about their gender.}

 

 

 

 On the other side of the mansion, Iona Kejberg shook his head at the four synchronised voices. He pitied the poor fool who antagonised them four. Stepping in in shit-

 Wait.

 They stepped in shit.

 They were in the conference room.

 He had lost bowel control at that exact spot.

 “Oh shit.”

 Oh shit indeed.

* * *

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sonou: MMF!  
> Ephiegel: What we learned?  
> Sonou: MMMMF!  
> Nyamu: *SLAP* WHAT WE LEARNED?!  
> Sonou: MF! MMMFF MF MMMF MF!  
> (Fools! I've got duct tape over my mouth!)


	9. Boss Even Before: Kyuu

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kyuu
> 
> Isn’t it beautiful, if not slightly askew,
> 
>  That kill rhymes with 9, kyuu?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Haiizzzzz  
> all these chapters feel like filler chapters  
> how tiring

* * *

  Kawamura Hiroku was perched precariously on the room’s balcony. Out of the entire building, only they, the Shi-Hashira, had the privilege of a balcony. The building was that dry, after all- just four rooms with a balcony each, while the remaining 296 rooms were small bunks or facilities… Or empty rooms that nobody had explored yet.

 Some had windows- some didn’t have any.

 The other 30 members of the Momokyokai occupied their own rooms.

 But he had a good feeling about Tsu-kun. He was so pure that it _hurt_ to see and know that it would be tainted eventually.

 He absentmindedly blew a strand of dark green hair off his face. Speaking of which, he was thinking of getting a gradient for black tips on his hair. Dark green was such a dull colour.

 “Reminiscing? C’mon, neKO, you know better than to be on a ledge while you do that.”

  

  
  


 “You know, the stars are beautiful tonight.”

 Akihiko Kaishi sighed at the pitiful cover-up attempt.

 “They always are.”

 He decides to stand next to Hiroku’s tiny form. All 48.9kg of Hiroku’s underweight ass is supported by a tiny ledge that’s slightly narrower than his foot.

 Five inches wide of one inch concrete is all that separates them from the six meter drop. It’s a daunting prospect that nearly makes Akihiko take a step back, that makes his stomach twist slightly, but he steps onto the ledge anyways.

 “Naa, got a light?”

 “Don’t you always?”

 Hiroku chuckles, just as Akihiko noticed it. Clearly the stress of changing Bosses so suddenly has taken a toll on him.

 “Fluid ran out, naa.”

 “Then you might as well drop the habit.”

 It’s true. When Hiroku smokes, he doesn’t just smoke one stick and call it a day. He tears through the pack at a pace that depends on the mood and situation.

 But Hiroku frowns.

 “Habit.”

 Akihiko snorts. A habit that he picked up from the streets, but he wasn’t on the streets anymore. He was one of the Shi-Hashira.

 “If that’s the case, you might as well do some Mary Jane, you know. Our stocks are still high for that one.”

 “Naaa, shut it, Hikikomori.”

 He feels himself growing a vein.

 “Don’t call me that-”

 “HIKIKOMORIIII-”

 “URUSAI, AHOU-”

 “You do realise that everyone’s tryna sleep, right?”

  
  


 The comedy duo clam up at the sight of one Mizunuma Suisen. His hair, always that shocking shade of blue, is clearly messy and ruffled from sleep. His face, though, has the stoic expression he always has. It’s clearly alert.

 “Stupid.”

 It is a murmur, but the evening wind swiftly whispers it to their ears- a small reminder that carries affectionate exasperation.

 But he disregards the silence that he brought to them, and sits in the middle of the two.

 “Sorry,” mumbles Hiroku.

 Oh boy, he knows what comes next-

 “NOT SORRY!”

 It’s a blast of condensed sound waves that utterly decimates his ear. It echoes through the entire town. He can see the assortment of lights that flicker on at the man-child’s exclamation. It spans over five blocks. But he isn’t a _Suisen_ for just having blue hair. He’s like water, or the sound of rushing water. He could be a river or a waterfall. It was up to him.

 He chose to be a leaking tap instead- not worthy of his anger.

 Hiroku settles down after that, though, and the three Pillars wonder if the fourth will come to complete the set. But they sit in the silence that comes after the man-child’s yell.

 Kawamura Hiroku stares at his dog tag that rests on his white undershirt. It was a metal ovalish-rectangle he’s lived with throughout all twenty-four years of his life. He’s always had it, even during those ring fights. It certainly explained the scratches that line it. All of it led to his position as the second Pillar.

 Akihiko Kaishi gazes at his pink hair. Not red. It’s just a light, faded pink that reminds him to dye his hair back to brown. Pink reminds him of too much painful memories. Things he’d rather keep hidden. Like his twin.

 Mizunuma Suisen glances at his Karambit. It’s just to make sure that it's still in its sheath in the cloak. Just a customary glance that leads to his lengthy examination of the chain of the Karambit. It’s metal. And it’s how he got his nickname and his position as the Fourth pillar, the Enforcement pillar.

 He checked his opal locket for good measure, and was rewarded with three grins-grins  that he sees every time he falls asleep, every time he eats, drinks, does anything.

 …

 He shuts it quickly, feeling his chest ache with longing, the burning of his legs to run to them, the cold emptiness of his arms which he has nothing **nobody** **_noone_ ** to wrap around, the feeling of being so so cold so lonely want someone 

 The door opens and closes behind them, just as the wind begins picking up.

 

 

 

 “What’re you fools doing? Get off the ledge. _Now._ ”

 The tone is irritated, and screams “you-idiot-why-do-I-even-need-to-tell-you-this”.

 It’s a tone that conveys a huge amount of eye-twitching and danger, and a dangerous Sakuza Kuzen will scare the socks (and underwear) of anybody that had been the cause of his aggravation.

 Most of the time, the culprits don’t survive the eventual punishment.

 As such, the three pillars quickly jump off the ledge instead. When they manage to execute a roll and break their fall, a furious Sakuza Kuzen follows.

 Right behind them, with his M203 grenade launcher attached to his M4 Carbine, which is chock-full of paint pellets for the occasion.

 Kaishi stares fearfully at the pocket computer he carried in his personal coat pockets.

 Suisen gulps.

 Hiroku grins nervously.

 He doesn’t say a thing that could end up instigating a reaction from the 169cm tall figure in front of them.

 Kuzen has an unholy glint in his grey eyes, and those same eyes, normally so welcoming, are shut tightly as a vein pulsates on his forehead.

 “Now, you idiots…”

 The three whimper as his shadow looms over them.

 “Time for some discipline.”

 “RAPE-”

  **THWACK**

“DAMNIT HIROKU STOP SCREAMING-”

  **_BANG_ **

**** “AAAAAAAAAAAAH-”

 “WHOSE BRIGHT IDEA WAS THAT-”

 “MERCY, FORA-”

 “ **_AAAAAAAAAA-_ ** ”

  

 

  
  


 Tsunayoshi wakes up the next day, ready to kick ass.

 Just kidding.

 He wakes up with a sore body, and snivels at the thought of going through more training with Ariel-obaa-san.

 “There’s a reason why I’m last in Physical Education-”

 “I hear ya, Tsuna.”

 “Urrgh…”

 He flops onto the bed-

 “HIEEE!”

 “Stop screaming! The neighbours’re gonna think you’re bein’ murdered, ya know.”

  
  
  


 The Wakame house next door freeze at the sudden noise from the Sawada house. Silence follows the scream, and one Oikero Wakame sticks his head through the window and screams.

 “Obaa-san! Sawada-obaa-san!”

 No response.

 The scream was definitely from Sawada Nana next door. Nobody else would have such a feminine scream.

 But to make an airhead like Sawada Nana scream… What could be that frightening?

 

  
  


 “Ya know, somone’s gunna think that it was me who screamed, ya know.”

 “O-okaa-san-”

 “Hush up, ya! What’s this I hear ‘bout you bein’ last in PE, huh?!”

 “A-I was talking about-”

 Tsunayoshi Sawada couldn’t lie for shit. Eyes averted, nervous stuttering, shaking like a leaf… Nana tutted disapprovingly.

 “We gonna exercise in the mornin’. Afternoon to _Pao pao ah Yii_ , then evenin’ fo’ study. Ya get that?”

 “Y-yes mam!”

 “We gotta work on ya lyin’ skills. They ain’t good at all. We gonna teach ya to lie bout not stealin’ the Hope Diamond when ya did.”

 “What diamond?”

 Tsunayoshi was startled by his mother falling to her knees.

 “Kami-sama… You don’t know that thing? Crazy  shit, ya know. French cursed diamond. Marie Antoinette, french kid Louis XIV. 45.52 carat, and a  super rare dark blue diamond. It was natural blue, ‘till some Ugetsu kid gave it Rain Flames. People think it’s some sorta curse-”

 “D-diamonds can be dark blue?!”

 “... You need some serious help wit’ tha’ lil’ noggin o’ yours.”

 Tsunayoshi gulped.

  


 Wantanabe Oikero fidgeted on the doorstep of the Sawada household. What was he to do? Rush in? Knock on the door? Ring the doorbell? Break in through the window? Dig an underground tunnel?!

 What would he see? Sawada Nana and a cockroach? A rat? A corpse? A heart-attack victim? Suicide victim? A bisected corpse?

 Kami-sama, he was giving himself a heart attack.

 He stood up and knocked on the door.

 No response.

 Just as he was seriously considering using the Sawada’s shovel to dig an underground tunnel, the door opened, swinging inwards.

 “Ara, aren’t ya the kid next door? Wazzat name, Wantanabe or somethin’? You their kid, right? Watchu need?”

 “W-wantanabe-san!”

 Oikero looked over Sawada Nana’s shoulder, eyes immediately locking onto a fragile brunette and mouth twisting into a sneer.

 He missed the predatory glint in the female Sawada’s eyes.

 “Tch, Dame-Tsuna-”

 In one fluid motion, the elder Sawada had swept him in, smashed him against the wall and shut the door.

 “You,” seethed a rather out-of-character Nana,” Are one of my Tsu-chan’s bullies?”

 “O-okaa-san!”

 “Tell me, Tsuna. This kid do any shit to you?”

 Watanabe Oikero sweated nervously. His gaze flicked from the terrifying woman to the useless kid, and wondered how they were related.

 He was gonna die, so what was the point wondering anyways?

 He watched as Dame-Tsuna licked his lips nervously.

 “It was just a penknife cut-”

 “A penknife. Cut.”

 “OKAA-SAN NO-”

 “I’LL LEAVE YOU FOR HIBARI, YA HEAR-”

 “AAAAAAAA **AAAAAA-** ”

 “NO! KAA-SAN, THAT’S EVEN WORSE-”

 “HE’S GOIN’ WITH YA TO _SIS-”_

“KAA-SAN, NO!”

 Absentmindedly, he wondered how Nana Sawada had transformed into such a fear-inducing woman, when Tsunayoshi-san had grown balls, and how bad Sawada-san’s sister was.

 

  
  
  


 “Hn.”

 Hai Lang Hibari sighed. For the thousandth time that day, she wished that her little sister wasn’t such a annoying little shit. And hoped the same for her son too.

 “Kyoya, you’ll be training Sawada Tsunayoshi-”

 “Hn.”

 A tick mark, and the twitching of her left eye for the third time in the minute.

 “Yes, he’s a herbivore-”

 “Hn.”

 “No, you may not turn down this. This isn’t my offer- it’s your Aunt’s.”

 “Hm?”

 Finally, a hint of interest. Her right eye had a temporary dance-off with her left eye.

 She took that to be a “Oh-I’m-slightly-interested”.

 “It’s Sawada-”

 “Hn.”

 ...Aaaaand they were back to square one again.

  
  
  
  
  


 “S’not just that crap we gonna train outta ya. We gonna teach ya how to have steel in decisions and your voice, how to command a legion of people and all that shit. That’s gonna be _pao pao dajie’s_ job, ya hear?”

 “Yes m’am!”

 Oikero Wakame stood next to Sawada Tsunayoshi, wondering how he had gotten into this mess. He had only come over to the Sawada household to check if Sawada Nana was alright, for crying out loud! This was a military regime, and it made him wonder if that was how Tsuna-san had grown balls.

 Somewhere in the dark recesses of his mind, he registered how he had taken to calling the wimp- no, classmate- by his actual name, and his nickname… Plus a honorific. Back then it was just “Dame-Tsuna” or “Idiot-Tsuna”, never Tsunayoshi, never Tsuna.

 Well, actually, there was some time when he was actually popular back then. But he kept changing, as if he had multiple personalities. It frightened everyone around, particularly when he mumbled to himself. Now that he thought about it, maybe he was just trying to be popular by using different personas.

 Maybe. It was doubtful whether Tsuna-san had any iota of intelligence anyways.

 Now, back to worrying about his life being in the hands (and mercy) of one Sawada Nana...

  
  


 “Now, Skylark-”

 “ _Hai lang da xiao jie, ni you ge ke ren-”_

_Mistress Hai Lang, you have a guest-_

Over the stylish intercomm, she could hear somebody wrestling with the attendant. Who would be audacious enough to demand an audience and fight with one of the Hibari’s attendants?

 … It was probably her little sist-

Hai Lang Hibari winced at the sudden explosion of high-pitched soundwaves. As did her little hellion of a son.

 “ _DA JIE_!”

 “...I should’ve taken my fortune reading seriously. ‘A myriad of troubles shall come your way”-”

 “ **_DAAAAA JIEEEEEE_ **!”

 “... Damnit.”

  
  


 “And how, exactly, did this happen?”

 Hibari Kyoya stared in fascination at the woman standing in the elevator that stepped out without hesitation. Even without any kind of dangerous weapons or negative expression, Sawada Nana was clearly a Carnivore. With a capital C. She was danger personified, and carried herself in a elegant and dignified way.

 He felt as if his life was at risk, at jeopardy.

 He felt… Honored to be related to such a Predator.

 And also by the way she was able to figure out what made his mother tick so easily. All the buttons were pushed and triggered reactions and it was fascinating to watch his mother’s left eye have a seizure slash ritual dance.

 “Neh, big sis, you know Project STB ERIN? The one about “Sawada Tsunayoshi Bully ERINdication?”

 His mother’s eyes twitched. Simultaneously. It seemed to resemble a wince than an eye tick.

 Slowly, she nodded. Once. As if she was trying to wrap her mind around some concept that Kyoya wasn’t privy to.

 “This,” Sawada Nana forcefully enunciated, pulling a boy by his collar,” Is Oikero-fucking-Watanabe, a.k.a. ST Bully 1~ Also goes by TESUB ichi~”

 The singsong way she said it made the word “Bully” so much clearer. Hibari Kyoya hissed, just as his mother let out a semblance of a low rumble. He might not have any attachments to the herbivorous Sawada Tsunayoshi, but he greatly _abhorred_ any kind of rebel against his precious order. When Kyoya turned to his mother, he noted, surprised, that his mother’s bun had come loose, and that her hair covered her left eye.

 Her hair was flying from all the static energy, crackling in an invisible force-field that kept her bun’s chopsticks floating. Or so he hoped, since having a _jiu wei hu,_ or a _hu li jing_ as a mother would be really troublesome. Kitsune, and fox spirits, as Japan’s culture called them.

 “Ara~ C’mere, Kero-kun~”

 Kyoya noted the way his mother adopted the same tone as Nana-obaa had adopted.

 And also how Oikero Watanabe seemed like an albino frog, so pale as it hopped into the jaws of the predator, trembling every now and then like true prey.

 “Ain’tcha so adorable~”

 Kyoya sweatdropped as his mother stretched the herbivore’s cheeks to inhuman proportions that would have resulted in two splotches of red from the pinching and stretching. Not to mention the uncharacteristic cooing- was Sawada Tsunayoshi worth getting so worked up over?

 “Ag-gah-hah-gwuh-!”

 “Ah, yes! I’ve got a couple of concoctions and exercise regimes I wanted to test! It’ll be interesting to see if a human could survive all that~”

 If the boy wasn’t pale before, he was now. Ridiculously pale, the herbivore awaited with bated breath as he froze on the spot. Kyoya’s mother left for the drafts she had made regarding one Sawada Tsunayoshi.

 “Ah, here it is!”

 The herbivore fainted at the metre long list.

 “Lesse… Two sets of hundred push-ups, three hundred sit-ups, and so much more! Aren't you excited? I know I am! “

  
  


 “ _Kai shi!_ ”

  _“Begin!”_

  
  


Hibari Kyoya decided that yes, Sawada Tsunayoshi was an adorable Omnivore that was worth getting worked over.

 He decided that he detested any enemies of the Omnivore.

 Oikero Watanabe was dying in the background, but he couldn’t care less.

 Let him learn his lesson of going against a Hibari’s ward.

 “Hn. Omnivore.”

 “Hibari-sempai-iiiii…”

 Kyoya noted how Tsunayoshi Sawada had been able to speak to him without the annoying stuttering most herbivores seemed so fond of doing in the presence of any Carnivore. That was good. Showing no fear was a admirable trait, and one that could tide him over many difficulties.

 He did end up smirking at the Omnivore’s wheezing of the “I” in his name.

 He watched as the Omnivore got up onto his two feet, swaying slightly. Muscle exertion, he noted.

 “Go home.”

 Surprised that he, Hibari Kyoya, Carnivore of the food chain, was adressing a lowly “herbivore” like him, the Omnivore staggered and fell flat onto the floor again.

 “Heh?”

 “Go home, Omnivore.”

 The omnivore’s angelic features lit up with understanding and euphoria at the acknowledgement he had given the Omnivore.

 He staggered into the lift-

 -and collapsed onto the pristine, white floor of the lift.

 Hibari Kyoya did nothing to suppress the urge to smirk.

 “Hibari-san…”

 “Hn.”

 “Please stop smirking at me…”

 “Hn.”

  _Good intuition. Truly worthy of the title of an Omnivore._

He smirked wider as the Omnivore continued to groan in misery on the ground. The doors of the elevator begun to slide shut as the Carnivore stepped over her son’s body and waved goodbye to the mother and son.

  _Such a conflicting paradox. I look forward to our next meeting… Sawada Tsunayoshi._

  


“So, you’re interested-”

 “Hn.”

 “Stop that-”

 “Hn.”

 “... You lil-”

 “Hn.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the holidays aren't even for rest anymore


	10. ;w;

;-;  
I'm just stuck with a lotta stuff  
1\. Holidays (i've been doing my homework, pixel art, slacking, stuff)  
2\. Relationship (i'm now not single ^^ with a really nice dood ^^^^^^^)  
3\. Major exam this year.... So yeah  
I might not be able to update for a dang long time  
16/06/2018 Uwaaaaa~~ 300 kudos~? You guys are the best!~ I'm still gonna be busy with preparations for the major exam, which makes me pretty guilty that I'm letting you guys down like this.... Maybe I'll update after the exams...


	11. Boss Even Before: Decimals

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Grief and lies and a new friend.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Because I honestly and finally have the effort.

 “Oikero-san… Are you-”

 “I’m fine-!”

 Tsunayoshi sweatdropped as Watanabe squealed like a pig. A very dead, going-to-be-decapitated pig. But-

 A whistle-!   
 “HIEEEEEE!!”

 Tsunayoshi instinctually dodged the tonfa thrown at his head, feeling the sting of the force close to his face. He quickly turned to Hibari Kyoya, quickly focusing on the one other tonfa left in his hand.

 Disarm?   
 Use the force to his advantage?

 Attack?

 A thousand possibilities flitted through his head, attacking his brain and creating a pounding headache. He really wished sometimes that it would shut up, but he knew how it kept him alive. Without his instincts, he’d be dead by now-

 Incoming!

  
 He lashed out with a pathetic low kick that caught the Hibari slightly off guard. Quickly exploiting the momentary vulnerability, he let his instincts flow and just knew what to do. A quick slap to his chest managed to knock the wind out of his lungs, and distracted him slightly. He quickly shoved Hibari on the back, managing to barely knock him down onto the ground.

 He twisted away, putting distance from the downed student president.

  
  


 Oikero Watanabe was stunned when Tsunayoshi Sawada managed to knock the legendary Hibrari Kyoya down. The wimp? Stronger than him? Than so many others? Than basically the whole student population of Namimori?

 Then again, thinking back, he wasn’t exactly all that surprised. From what he saw, the idiot just relied on instincts, timing and speed… He barely had enough strength to knock the other down.

 The older, female Hibari caught his look. He didn’t know what kind of expression he had at that moment, but judging by her expression… She saw something she liked.

 He spotted Hibari Kyoya getting up again, though, and turned his focus back to the matter at hand- surviving this brutal beatdown.

  
  


 It was over for the day.

 Oikero crawled to the elevator as Tsunayoshi dragged him in half heartedly. Both of them were exhausted, Tsunayoshi slightly less so than Oikero.

 “You know… Tsuna… Maybe… You’re not half bad…”

 Oikero’s pained wheezing was winning the noise competition between his and Tsuna’s gasping.

 “You too, Oikero… san…”

 Maybe, thought the bully, maybe Tsuna wasn’t as dame as he thought. He finally mustered the strength to stand and look Tsuna in the eye.

 “Tsuna-san…. I think we should ally ourselves next time when we come back.”

 There seemed to be a small spark of orange hope in Tsuna’s eye, just so fleeting.

 “Well, if I don’t drag you down, I don’t see why not.”

 “I doubt it! You stood your ground against him and damn, I’ve never seen anyone fight like you!”

 A friendly slap to Tsuna’s back, and a roguelike grin to his direction. 

 “If anything, I’m more afraid of dragging you down!”

 Ground floor. He stepped out, a new appreciation for the boy he once thrust into lockers and janitor closets.

 Tsunayoshi Sawada… Was a better person than he’d ever be.

  
  


 It was thirty past midnight. Tsunayoshi’s intuition was working up again.

**Go home. Rest. Be ready. Home. Home. Home. Graveyard.**

He paused.

_ Graveyard? _

__ **Take the path next to the graveyard.**

He followed without question, all resistance having been beat out of him by metal tonfas, because- according to Ariel obaa-san, anything below metal and Kyoya would refuse to wield, would break in a single hit- and he hit hard.

 In the nightly fog that descended upon Nami, he saw the figure of Suisen there. Just there, standing.

 Was it a nightmare? 

 He looked like a Yurei ready to haunt the living daylights out of anyone. Dark blue hair dripping with the earlier downpour that set upon Namimori, the cloak he usually donned wrapped around a-

 A tombstone.

 As Tsuna neared, he spotted the others. 

 Akihito was there, his-

 Was his hair always dyed? His hair was red now…

 And there was Kuzen. Morosely silent, just watching the duo of them, and there was Hiroku, watching over them all.

 Hiroku was silent.

 Too silent.

 And as Tsuna walked closer, closer, even closer, he made out Suisen’s lips moving. He vaguely made out Suisen mentioning something about love. Something about days cut short.

 His heart throbbed harshly. Painfully.

 Sakuza turned to crane his neck, to look at the obscuring fog. He spotted the shock of brown and relaxed, beckoning Tsuna to come closer.

 “Are those…”

 Kuzen stayed silent a bit more.

 “The tombstones of those they lost.”

 The silence served to let the “lost" echo. Over and over, repeating in Tsuna’s head.

 “Who?”

 “Suisen… Lost his wife and kid to our previous boss. We found the record in our archives.”

 Tsuna felt anger bubble out again. Again with that dumb shit.

 “And Akihito… A rival gang mistook his twin for him.”

 And then anger subsided, giving way to a cauldron of sorrow, of some measure of apology and a sprinkle of anger still.

 Family- actual, true blood related family- dragged into another family they might have never known about.

 It was ridiculous, it was disgusting, it was a low blow.

 “That’s life. So, boss, you got to face reality sometime.”

 Absently, Tsuna noted Hiroku’s lack of his usual verbal tic.

 “It’s foolish, it’s stupid, it’s fate, it’s future. Whatever you want to call it. Me though, I think it’s life. Life always has a huge, fucking cock, and it’s going to do anal on every bitch it sees. It’s fucking us all up, tying us up, doing whatever it wants.”

 Tsuna still heard a soft choke at Kuzen who cuffed Hiroku over the head for that analogy.

 They all left home silently. Tsuna a little more morosely than usual, everyone back to usual, but just a little sadder, a little too bright, too plastic.

 Tsuna’s gut churned as his hyper intuition spammed lie over and over.

 “I bet that bbq spot is really good!”

**lie**

“Damn, I forgot my cloak.”

**Lie.**

“We can buy a new one.”

**LIe.**

Static filled his ears at every lie. And then-

**LIELIELIELIELIELIELIE**

“Everything alright, Boss?”

_ No. _

“Yeah. It’s all fine.”

 And his world erupted in static and he staggered and he smiled and laughed with them and acted just as much as they did and went home-

 And slept peacefully.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know it sucks~

**Author's Note:**

> Ephiegel: Haha! Ciao, I'm Ephiegel! Call me that, or Sono, or Umano! Or whatever you want. But all that aside, I fell in love with KHR a couple weeks ago, so I'm like a baby chick.  
> Sonou: Except that chicks are cuter than we are.  
> Nyamu: Shhh. Let her have her moment. We're just background characters.  
> Ephiegel: Yoroshiku, minna-san!  
> Sonou: Tch, whatever. Stay outta my way and I MIGHT just spare you.  
> Nyamu: *smacks sonou* I'm Nyamu. You'll find me to be the only shred of sanity in this dog pile.  
> Sonou: VOII! THE HELL YOU MEAN BY THAT, HUH?!  
> Nyamu: Exactly what it sounded like.  
> Ephiegel: Shh. I'm supposed to be doing my holiday homework. And that's why this chapter's so short.  
> Nyamu: Then go back to work.  
> Ephiegel: Well, bye~  
> Sonou: Crazy bitch, lemme down!  
> Nyamu: Stop aggravating our situation.


End file.
